Anyone who knows me know that I am a planner. I am always thinking about the next step and the choices that come with that next step. Sometimes it was so bad because I would become so consumed with the future that I really didn’t enjoy the present. When I met my husband and we were dating I was so nervous because I knew I loved him early and I was concerned about the future possibilities and options associated with this relationship. After many days of contemplation I read a quote from Oprah Winfrey that changed my life.

Breathe. Let Go and remind yourself that this moment is the only one you know for sure. 

That quote changed me for good from that moment on. Although I am still a planner, I realized that I cannot stress about the possibilities and options of the future. But I can focus on what today brings and what I know for sure. This concept settled my heart, mind and spirit.

Lesson 7: I will live each day relishing on the things I know for sure.

There are people that I consider close to me who have labored in this journey called life. They have seen the real Felicia. When my sisters or mom say things to me and as much as I don’t want to admit it, I listen and evaluate myself because I know they have my best interest at heart. Then, there are people who don’t really know me but have only seen me in passing. These are people I may have met at work or school. Although they may have interacted with me they have not experience the depths of who I am. The thoughts and feelings of those people are welcomed but not always warranted or true. They may have biases or other factors that play into their assessment and perhaps it does not take into account the total me. It used to bother me what people who didn’t know me thought of me and their judgments. What I have learned is in any suggestion, judgment, or criticism, I have to consider the source. Every source I shouldn’t take to heart because they have not gotten the opportunity to see me in totality or the intention for providing feedback may not be pure. Whenever someone offers feedback, suggestions, or criticism about me, I just consider the source and intent. This is still an ongoing battle. But I always take the time to not dismiss but evaluate all the factors and then make a decision to accept or reject it. Every comment does not warrant action remembering that everyone cannot perceive who you are.

Lesson 6: I have to consider the source in which my feedback comes and assess how much I am willing to change. Every comment does not warrant action.